All of My Lipstick Recommendations

Because there is nothing better than red lipstick to make a gal feel chic!

Dear friends,

Happy Friday! I am writing to you from my backyard, where I am drinking an array of absolutely necessary beverages (water, peanut butter latte, sparkling water), completing some reading for a summer Greek course for my M.T.S., and generally basking in the sounds of a mellow early afternoon in Southern California- gardeners at work, bluebirds flittering about, neighbors chatting together in backyards. Today, I’m excited to share this month’s long-form essay on the topic of something that has been my most beloved everyday essential for the past eight years- lipstick. I’ve chalked up a lot of experience wearing lipstick, gifting lipstick, and fielding lipstick-related inquires; most recently, I was speaking to a woman in the Denver airport who asked about my lipstick and then proceeded to purchase it on Amazon.

Over the years, I have had many conversations about lipstick with friends, acquaintances, people online, and strangers, and I have heard a lot of the same concerns come up again and again, particularly when it comes to a bold lip:

• “I don’t want to seem too formal/dressed up.”

• “I feel too self-conscious wearing red lipstick.”

• “I wish I could wear it, but I’m over 50.”

• “I could only really wear it on a night out.”

• “I don’t think that red really suits me.”

• “I don’t want to draw attention to my acne.”

• “I’ve heard that red lipstick isn’t professional.”

• “I don’t want to come across as too much.”

In part, these hesitations likely originate from the reality that millennials and Gen Z don’t tend to wear lipstick on a daily basis anymore. For a lot of us, the only time that we are seeing other women wearing a bright red lip regularly is on a PBS Masterpiece show. I have seen countless articles about getting over one’s fear of lipstick, becoming comfortable with red lipstick, and tips for wearing a bold lipstick throughout the day.

As the writer of the first article mentioned, though: there is something about red lipstick that signals “uninhibited confidence.” Lipstick draws attention to your features- it’s striking. And that is part of the reason why I love lipstick so much: it has served as a way to reclaim being a woman who takes herself seriously. Many people (predominantly men) so often say this about women like it’s a negative thing, and it isn’t. I love it when women are intense, or unapologetically ambitious, or don’t “just take a joke” when said joke is derogatory, demeaning, and disrespectful. Women aren’t subtle, and over the years I have found that a bold, vibrant lip reinforces that.

Lady Mary’s wise (deeply relatable) words in Downton Abbey.

I’ve often noticed that many of the reasons beauty writers will give for wearing lipstick center around the historicity of it- Cleopatra's lipstick of crushed beetles is cited, as are the suffragettes in the early 1900s and the servicewomen in WW2. And because I’m in general highly critical of the cosmetics industry, industrialized skincare, microtrends, etc., I have mixed feelings about categorizing red lipstick as inherently “empowering” (hardly a useful term, I’ve found!), but do want to suggest that it can inspire strength, sophistication, and confidence in individual women.¹

I studied philosophy and theology in college (both heavily male-dominated fields) and am currently pursuing a master’s in theology, and for the longest time I internalized this idea that to be taken seriously, you need to present things- whether that be a slideshow presentation or yourself- as masculine and neutral as possible. Last year, I presented at the Society of Biblical Literature wearing a lavender coat, a flowered blouse, statement earrings, red heels, and red lipstick, while talking about the Eucharist’s ethical dimensions and the salvific contemporary echo of Mary’s Magnificat. And the entire time, I was reminded of why I love a bright red lip so much.

You don’t need a special occasion to wear lipstick- wear it to run errands! Wear it to get coffee with a friend! Wear it while cooking at home! I’ve frequently been complimented on my lipstick, being told something to the effect of “I wish I could wear lipstick like that!” or “I wish that kind of red looked good on me!” and I always respond with “you can! It would!” Regardless of whether you are opting for jeans and a white tee or a dress and flats for church, a bold lip can help pull an outfit together.

When it comes to lipstick, clothes, and self-presentation in general, I’m a firm believer that the overall goal is not what is “flattering”. I recall writer Meg Conley’s Instagram post: “my kids hate this dress… And like, it is kind of aggressively unflattering? But that is one hundred percent why I love it. It’s not made to flatter… Like, to be a person who desires so much but has outgrown the desire to be desired? That’s hot.”² With that being said, if trying to match lipstick to your skin tone helps you to feel more confident in wearing lipstick, I’m all for it, but I also encourage you to hold onto the idea that the right lipstick for you is really just the one you like wearing. I have light brown hair with green eyes and warm undertones, so I’m well aware that soft pinks, peachy nudes, and mauves are what “flatter” my complexion best, but don’t reference this when buying a new shade. I buy formulas I think I’ll like! I buy colors that catch my eye! And you should, too!

Another green-eyed blonde, Amanda Seyfried, donning a dark, luscious purple (NARS Pure Matte in Volga) for the Twin Peaks premiere back in 2017.

In pushing back against these ideas about “flattering",” I suggest that, instead, we ask:

• Who defines what is "flattering" in women’s presentation?

• What cultural or societal norms influence my perception of what is appropriate or attractive?

• How does the beauty industry profit from promoting specific ideals of beauty through the marketing of cosmetics, clothing, skincare, etc.?

• Who benefits financially from my desire to adhere to these beauty standards?

Lipstick doesn’t have to be complicated, but it can be tricky when figuring out where to start. With that being said, here is my annual compilation (updated every year!) on buying lipstick, wearing lipstick, and leaning into the everyday elegance it offers us.

Top 5 Tips and Tricks

1. Sticking to seasonal colors may help with the initial shock factor. For spring and summer, opt for pinks, oranges, and corals. For autumn and winter, try berries, mauves, and browns. A classic red, however, is perfect for any month of the year.

2. Lip liner and concealer are both key. To create a more defined lip shape, blot concealer around your mouth with a small, flat-edged concealer brush. Lip liner is also an important key to helping achieve a precise, full, and longer-wearing lip.

3. One of the greatest recommendations that I can offer you is to dab, not swipe your lipstick when applying it. At least, do not swipe it more than you have to. Gently dabbing lipstick onto your lips is ultimately much more effective and it allows you to have greater control concerning the intensity of your chosen color.

4. Use a tissue to prevent lipstick from bleeding onto your teeth. This happens to all of us, and often at the most socially unfortunate times, but you can help to prevent it in the future by wadding some tissue up, placing it into your mouth, and smacking your lips together after you have already applied your lipstick.

5. Keep Q-Tips handy for touching up throughout the day. Unless you are wearing a particularly long-lasting matte shade, you are going to have to touch up your lipstick at some point later in the day, so have Q-Tips or cotton swabs handy.

My 2024 Lipstick Recommendations ($ to $$$)

• Burt’s Bees Matte Lip Crayon in Redwood Forest was first introduced to me by the prolific lipstick-wearing theologian Joy Clarkson. I especially recommend this crayon for anyone who isn’t particularly used to wearing a heavier, matte lip- it’s infused with shea butter and jojoba oil and is both vibrant and moisturizing.

• Maybelline SuperStay in Exhilarator, Individualist, and Voyager are all shades that I have had since I was a freshman in college. The formula is the most long-lasting one that I have ever used, but the matte finish can be drying for some. However, there’s a lot of color options, and it’s a well-deserving drugstore classic.

• Sunnies Face Fluffmatte in Major, Casual, and Party are only three of many (24 to be exact) shades offered by the Filipino-based beauty brand. Fluffmatte is best paired with a lip liner, as the formula is not super long-lasting in and of itself, but it makes up for it with both a moisturizing formula and a velvety, satin finish.

• Fenty Beauty Stunna Lip Paint in Uncensored is not only a vibrant, classic red lip but is also, according to brand founder Rihanna, “universally flattering.” Because it is highly pigmented, you don’t have to use much product at once, and the unique shape of the applicator helps with applying this more liquidy formula.

• Stila Stay All Day Liquid Lipstick in Beso is perhaps best known as Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez’s go-to lipstick. As The Cut staff writer Madeleine Aggeler observed, this formula is liquidy, but is also very long-lasting (i.e. “you could make out with someone and your faces wouldn’t end up looking like a crime scene.”

• Glossier G Suit in Shift and Jet are both favorites of mine, despite my mixed feelings about the company in general (see the book Glossy by Marisa Meltzer, reviewed by Jessica DeFino here). I wasn’t a huge fan of Glossier’s Ultralip because I prefer a less-balmy, more-matte texture, but love the G Suit formula.

• Pound Cake Cake Batter in Maraschino Cherry is one of my go-to red lipsticks; the company offers six different shades of red to choose from, all crème-matte. It’s long-lasting, moisturizing, and has a minimal but yummy vanilla icing scent.

• Pat McGrath Labs LiquiLUST in Elson4 is widely known as the lipstick that Taylor Swift donned in the “Bejeweled” music video. It’s a cool-toned red described as a “vivid blue red” with a longevity that will last through the day.

• ILIA Color Block Lipstick in Rumba and Cinnabar are incredibly true to the “skincare-powered makeup” concept behind the brand. This lipstick’s formula is made with castor seed oil, jojoba oil, and Shea butter, creating a natural-looking, pigmented finish that is moisturizing in a similar way to Burt’s Bees’ products.

• Bésame Cosmetics Red Velvet Lipstick in 1946 is based on a very popular shade worn by women in the years immediately following WW2. The makeup artist for Agent Carter used this exact lipstick on Hayley Atwell’s character in the movie.

• Violette FR Petal Bouche Matte in Amour Fou, created by makeup artist and YouTube vlogger Violette Serrat, is one of my most well-loved French lipsticks. It is the epitome of red lipstick- effortlessly chic, with an unusually smooth, velvety finish for a matte lipstick. It was reviewed by several different beauty editors here.

• Dior Couture Color Lipstick in 999 is a timeless icon of the beauty world, first launched as “shade 9” in 1953. It’s very likely one of the priciest lipsticks that I own, but I love the fact that it presents as a fairly neutral red- not too cool-toned, not too warm-toned. It’s a forgiving formula, and you get what you pay for.

Alright friends- signing off. I love sharing these with you every year, so do let me know if there’s been a lipstick (or lipsticks!) in your life that you particularly adore.

Warmly,

Julia

1. Jessica DeFino writes about how beauty culture impacts women externally and existentially in her Substack newsletter The Review of Beauty, and I’m thinking here about her piece on how feeling empowered (the sensation promised by many a cosmetic product and procedure) does not equate to being empowered. You can read it here: https://jessicadefino.substack.com/p/youre-not-wearing-makeup-for-you-40b21722712f?utm_source=publication-search.

2. https://www.instagram.com/p/ChYLE3CsibC/?igsh=MTc4MmM1YmI2Ng%3D%3D